Exploring clients’ responses to changing pronoun use from second person (you) to first person ( I ) during therapy: A constructivist qualitative approach

Background Personal pronouns like ‘ I ’, ‘me’ or ‘mine’ are inextricably linked with ownership, with one key benefit of a counsellor inviting a client to consider their pronoun use being an invitation to change their awareness and understanding of a situation. Objective To gain greater understanding of the impact of inviting clients to use first person pronoun ‘ I ’, in place of second ‘you’ during therapy and its effects upon the client and therapeutic process. Method A constructivist qualitative approach using exploratory thematic analysis that engaged one‐to‐one counselling and follow‐up interviews was used. Participants ( n  = 11) were clients who had been referred for counselling via primary care with problems like depression, relationship break‐up and/or stress. Findings Several themes were identified in the data: (1) potential discomfort from switching to first position; (2) awareness increased; (3) avoidance of taking responsibility recognised; (4) depersonalisation of events; (5) initiating change; and (6) effects on sense of self. Comments illustrate that reframing pronouns into first person removes distance between client emotions and problems, which provides them with an opportunity for development. Discussion Clients can be affected in productive ways when counsellors encourage them to alter their pronoun use during therapy. Through the use of reflection, the counsellor can work with their client to explore more fully their attributions of responsibility within situations that are discussed.