Patterns in the Telling: Single Women's Intimate Relationships with Men

This article explores some ways in which women not living with an intimatepartner talk about their relationships with men. Data are considered in relationto social theorising on the changing nature of intimate relationships. Theanalysis makes use of traditions in narrative analysis and critical discursivepsychology to identify some patterns in the telling, including common culturalresources that are drawn on by speakers. Patterned ways of portrayingrelationships identified in the data discussed here include a self-blameapproach in describing extreme behaviour from the man concerned, and arepudiation of any intention of commitment through talk of the positive featuresof relationships with unavailable men. A further way of talking introduces a‘new realism’ in which relationships are depicted as right for a time butdispensable when their time is up. The analysis suggests that concepts ofindividualisation and impermanence in relationships provide new culturalresources that women can draw on in providing a self-narrative. The datademonstrate the detailed rhetorical work involved in producing a positiveaccount of the self as a single woman.