The Fifth Column: Working for Free So You Can Work for Money So You Can Work for Free Again

A Common Question Over the years, I have had numerous people ask me how I ever got started as a consultant. They are espe cially curious because I do not appear to be a member of the "button-down brigade" and I certainly don't fit the profile of Andersen Consulting or Deloitte & Touche. Since my attainment of near perfection in pomposity, it makes no sense that I would ever be brought in as a consultant. So what is going on? Sit back and relax. Because I only do pro bono work now, I'm no threat to anyone. All will be finally revealed by the man behind the curtain. First, I clearly understand that I am never called in early on a problem. I'm not the starting pitcher. I'm the closer. In short, I am not called in to heal the sick. I am only brought in to raise the dead. Bluntly, my phone rings after the engagement has been completely blown and all other legal remedies are exhausted. As I mentioned before, I have been paid very well to be brought in a closed car at "O dark thirty" in the morning, fix the problem, leave, and agree (contractually) that I was never there. For similar reasons, some of my best pro bono work for various military establishments will still be classified after I am long gone. Second, I have persisted in the quaint notion that you cannot improve anything you haven't done. And, as my friends know, I mean: "DO IT," not watch it. I have turned down a plethora of possible consulting en gagements because I, or one of my students, would not be allowed to "work the line." Most recently, I turned down the Home Security Office of a name less country. I turned it down because this country wanted me to improve the length of its queues but would not allow either me or my students to take the training, become a search and wand person, and DO the job. (Remember, I and my students work on a pro bono basis for government agencies I approve of.)