Relational self-regulation: Gender differences in risk for dysphoria.

This study examined gender differences in the level and psychological significance of discrepancy with own ideal standards versus ideal standards held by parents and close others. Women showed higher levels of discrepancy with their own ideal standards than with the inferred ideal standards of parents and close others, suggesting that women may seek congruency with others' hopes and wishes at the price of failing to attain their own aspira- tions. Men showed equal levels of discrepancy with their own and significant-other ideal standards. Discrepancy with own ideal standards was associated with increased dysphoria in both men and women, but discrepancy with others' ideal standards was associated with significantly elevated levels of dysphoria only in women. Beliefs that failing to meet others' standards would result in abandon- ment and rejection (self-other contingency beliefs) contrib- uted independently from discrepancy in predicting dysphoria. These findings suggest that the tendency to modulate affect, self-esteem and behaviour from a rela- tional perspective (relational self-regulation) may increase risk for psychological distress. Women may be more likely to adopt this regulatory style as a function of their social- ization experiences.