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Citations are getting more and more important in the career of a researcher.But how to use them in the best possible way? This is a satirical paper,showing a bad trend currently happening in citation trends, due to intensiveuse of citation metrics. I am putting this on the arXiv and on Researchgate.Should you be interested to publish this paper on a journal of which you areeditor, let me know.

Dr. Strangelove or: how I learned to stop worrying and love the citations