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Using a phenomenological framework, we interviewed gender nonconforming, nonbinary, and binary transgender (GNBT) youth and young adults on the topic of disclosing non-cisgender identities within families of origin. We found that before a formal conversation and declaration takes place, there are subtle and unconscious in/formal hints of identifying as something beyond the bounds of cisgenderism. We call these precursors “breadcrumbs.” These crumbs of gendered truths function to consciously test the relational waters while simultaneously subconsciously understanding familial gendered expectations. While there are some positive reactions from family to these breadcrumbs, GNBT youth often experience conflict, disappointment, and moments of rejection as they test the boundaries of what is possible within their families’ understanding of gender norms.

Breadcrumbs for Family: How Gender Nonconforming, Non-Binary, and Transgender Adults Give and Receive Gender Messages