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In this chapter, we discuss motivational-primacy research as a framework for contemplating when egoism can be transcended. Our research examines which of three fundamental forms of self-definition—the individual self (i.e., self as a unique and independent social agent), the relational self (i.e., self as an interconnected partner in an interpersonal relationship), and the collective self (i.e., self as an undifferentiated and interchangeable member of a group)—is experientially more essential; psychologically the home base; or, alternatively, motivationally primary. Stated metaphorically, we ask which self smiles brighter when enhanced and screams louder when threatened. As we discuss in this chapter, data from several studies evidence a motivational hierarchy with the individual self elevated above the other two selves, and the relational self elevated above the collective self. In the context of that hierarchy, a quieter ego can be conceptualized as a self-system in which the motivational striving of the individual self is deemphasized and brought into balance with the strivings of the other selves. A quieter or transcended ego, for example, could appear as a lessened concern for protecting and enhancing the individuated person and a heightened concern for protecting and enhancing others through their inclusion in the relational or collective self. Central to this chapter is the implication from the hierarchy that such transcendence is more likely when social relations involve another person, who is internalized through the relational self, than when relations involve a group, which is internalized through the collective self. We begin the chapter with a review of the primacy research to justify and frame the persongroup implication and proceed with exploring the implication in the context of three diverse bodies of research.

Hierarchy among selves: An implication for relations with persons versus groups.